I stepped into 40 like a warm bath...
- š”š¶šøšøš¶ šš®šøššµĀ®
- Jun 30, 2020
- 5 min read
We often experience trepidation nearing significant birthday milestones - 25, 30, 40, 50 years of age.....but I've always known that my 40's would be a time of blissful balance, empowered knowing, soul centeredness, and exciting exploration.
So when I "officially" stepped into 40 last Wednesday (6/24), I lovingly embraced this new beginning with open arms. Like an invitation into a warm nourishing bath, I gently submerged my entire being with ease and grace into this auspicious new decade.
You see, since the universe is "rigged in our favor," the numerical number of 40 has never affected my awareness negatively. In fact, I've been looking forward to this decade and new beginning for almost 20 years!
I know. I know.
You probably are thinking..... WHY!?š¤Ø
The number 40 has always been synonymous with incredible meanings spanning both secular and religious traditions:
Noah's Ark - raining for 40 days and 40 nights
Moses was an Egyptian prince for 40 years, and then roamed the wilderness as an Israelite for 40 years
Lent is observed for 40 days
Jesus fasted in the desert for 40 days
In Islam, there is belief that the universe is supported by 40 pillars
There were 40 mourning nights in the mysteries of Persephone and 40 days of sacrifices in the greeting of Mithra
In numerology, 40 is associated with:
Pragmatism
Dignity
Security
Focus
(To read more about the significant meanings of 40, click here)
As a spiritual lightworker, a divine being experiencing human form, there are downloads of cosmic wisdom, that have always streamed through me since childhood.
I didn't quite know exactly WHY, I looked forward to 40, and in fact, was super excited for any woman in my life, who was turning 40 (even though they were usually not as excited as me...š¤£) ---- but, I simply had the inner "knowing" that the 40s are AWESOME!
For some reason, it tends to be that "aging" -- or as I like to effectively call it Leveling UP -- tends to affect women more so than men. Perhaps, this has to do with our cycle, childbearing abilities, and our biological clock. Who's to say these days?š¤·š½āāļø
In my 20's, I dedicated myself to exploring and living* my passions - art, dance, fitness, parties, socializing, health, wellness...FUN š š! The 20s allowed me to play with the things I was envisioning in my mind and wanted to externally experience.
In my 30's, I specifically asked for hard heavy life lessons: emotional healing, healing from ancestral karmic patterns, breaking free from personal limitations, healing past lives --- basically, asking the universe to show me *ALL* of my shit that would generally take a lifetime or several to experience. You can also think of this, as asking to be shown all of your demons, your shadows, the sides of self which trigger fear, shame, blame, and guilt. š³
When we live a spiritual life,
the life that is actually being lived is divinely co-created with our higher selves (spirit) in conjunction with the universal forces ---- the unbound, limitless, pure potential energy.
There is an awareness that everything is happening for our benefit of growth + ultimate success. Our limited human brain and ego, however, tells us things are happening to us.
Now while you may share a different perspective to me, remember
I specifically stated that this occurs when we are living a spiritual life š.
My inner compass has always guided me with a general macro-view of foreshadowing. My 30s brought so much healing of deep trauma, both personally and ancestrally. However, when you ask the universe for something, beware that the energy fields are rigged in YOUR favor.
Ask and you shall receive.
So while my 30s were providing deep healing, this was largely happening in conjunction with new MAJOR life challenges, emotional + energetic divorces, physical dissolutions, mental rewirings, and more. Talk about an internal shit show for real!
When this year's Summer Solstice 2020 happened the day before New Moon in Cancer, during the same week as my auspicious new decade was starting, I literally felt all of the fragmented aspects of my being energetically YOKE.
(20+20 = 40; quarantine also means 40)
There was no longer a duality of my shadow/light sides.
There was no longer an "awareness" of my energetic spirit and human physical body.
There was no longer the feeling of healing past traumas, personally or ancestrally, or stepping into an exciting new future.
There was simply a full awareness of BEING + embodying the present.... NOW.
Embodying ME.
It was similar to when I stepped back into my body from walking through the tunnel of light during my near-death experience (2 months shy of my 30th birthday --- again, beware what you ask for.)
I felt myself energetically step into myself as a WHOLE.
If you are familiar with printed photos, imagine each frame of the negative as snapshots of your entire life experiences. Now imagine standing up, and feeling all of those individual segments of the film strip, sped up --- one after the other---and coming into the back of your head.
Imagine being hit with ALL of the flashes of your life like every memory is hurdling towards the back of your head. It's as though someone hit me in the back of my head, and I stepped fully into new shoes š , a new body, a new lifeš±, a new everything.
Every negative, every trauma, everything that no longer served ---- wiped clean!
Welcome to a fresh start.
So while you may have anxiety, nerves, pre-conditioned thoughts about aging and entering new phases of life, embrace that you are given, not only what you ask for, but also what is ultimately for your highest good!
It's not enough to ask for what we want.
If what we want does not serve our highest good, which is there to help us serve and uplift humanity --- then we will not be granted our desire.
If however, we ask for something that will encourage us to become the greatest version of ourselves to help uplift others, then the universe will absolutely grant our desires. The key is whether our desires are aligned with the collective consciousness of ALL.
Whether it's aging, a new venture, a restarting of self/business/awareness, moving, closing a business, what-have-you, see if you can embrace this feeling of trepidation as a gift.
The discomfort is a lesson in disguise...rigged in your favor...to level up.
When I acknowledge discomfort and embrace the gift, I also become aware that difficulty is meant for breakthroughs.
Step into your unknowns with open arms.
Use tools, like community, meditation, yoga, wellness, and self-care you, during the difficulty of your experience, to nourish yourself, transcend discomfort, and simply:
Step into the new, like a warm bath.
Thank you for reading.
With love,
Nik
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